Road to the Tetons. 

Day three of our adventure to the Tetons was an eight hour drive to meet their snowy, jagged lines and incredible wonder. It is incredible. 
Funny thing is that I got a text from a friend along the way who was being silly and said that the journey isn’t about the destination, which is true, but the literal road to the Tetons has me thinking of the mental one that’s gotten me here. 
I wish I could express to you without being overcome with emotion how God planted this dream in my head through my sister and then my friends and family…almost 9 months ago and here we were driving through Wyoming to actually complete it. 
Listening to country music and talking about all that life has brought our way and we made it here. Laughing, feeling like we’ve lost our minds to altitude and maybe a little bit to sugar high. 
Reflecting on the mental preparation for this race is more than difficult for me. It’s not pretty. It doesn’t sound or look inspiring. It’s not clean neat lines. It’s defeat. It’s pain. It’s hopelessness. And tears. Many, too many tears. Good thing my friends and family are rockstars. 

Over a month ago I sat in a hospital room feeling like I couldn’t run this race. It didn’t matter how beautiful everything else was. All I could think about was hip pain. 

But there’s also faith. Hope. And the goodness of God that shines through even the worst situations. 
I know life could be worse. I know I have it good. But defeat and hopelessness and hurt try to make their way into your life and no one is immune to that or excused from it. Those things will try and try and try again. 
Eating BBQ at bubbas and dipping our feet in our hot tub was the part of the start to our welcome to the Tetons, but this trip is going to end with breaking our fears. Breaking what we thought we couldn’t do…and in all that we are coming out of this place better than we went into it. 
So thank you for this push. All the people who’ve contributed and supported. Life is meant to be lived to the fullest, even when we don’t feel we have it to give. 

When you don’t think it gets any better…

Day two. 
I’ve been looking forward to this moment for a long time. 
It’s hard to describe how a person feels at that moment when you have no idea what to expect. Not for certain what you’ll see or encounter. And yet here we are road tripping to maroon bells in aspen, Colorado and hanging lake in glenwood springs. 
Heart eyes are a terrible understatement. Any words I use will most likely be a disservice here. They don’t quite fill the shoes. Massive is a word you don’t understand the definition to until you feel how immense something this phenomenal is…no words. Like I said. 
Every time we see something I feel like it cannot get better than this…and then I’m put in my place again. Oh, but it can. 
God has seriously just given us gifts being here. It’s a trip for the books and only day two. 
Colorado, you are rad. As I fall in love. Reflect. Trip over my own words. And encounter the incredible idea of breath taking. Speechless. Wind knocked out of me. I give you a few photos (I took 400) of places a human like myself feels only exist in movie sets and fairy tale worlds. 
From tropical oasis waterfalls and straight up hikes, to panoramic, aspen covered mountains and slow steady hikes…covered in snow, my heart is so so so full. Thank you Jesus. 

Colorado. 

Day one and my heart is already over flowing. How I missed this jagged horizon. 
Seeing the snow on the peaks as we landed was literally heart eyes, happy tears, and a million other emotions. 
It’s too hard to describe the vastness. 

It’s too hard to describe how massive the mountains truly are. You just have to experience them. 
We were all exhausted today. Hardly any sleep maybe 12 hours all three of us combined. I can’t tell you though how thankful I am for friends who are cool with this.

This crazy adventure. Days packed with hiking, driving, and anticipation of what we will find. 
Tuesday we drove to the broadmoor at Colorado Springs and then to hike garden of the gods.
The broadmoor I might say was more than expected. It started to rain upon arrival and the troopers I have for friends say we are going to take on the 224 stairs….steep stairs to view all seven falls. Not only that, but to hike inspiration point at the top, in the rain. Facing our fears of heights, we did this together. 
The second adventure of our day was hiking through garden of the gods. I spent too much time with “mountain brain” laughing with two girls as we named our own rock formations instead of just finding the ones  given. 
Thankful. Beyond thankful. We are beyond pumped for what the week brings. 

Love

I sat at the park yesterday and remembered someone saying once that because they’ve experienced heartbreak they know love.
I started to think about that and quickly decided comparison in that way may have some ability to increase gratitude, but should never define how we measure or understand love. Experiences are all different. But we don’t grade papers based off the best kid in class. We grade papers off the truth. 

We need a constant. An absolute.
I know love, because I know Jesus, not because I live in a broken world and anything better than broken will do. 

Proverbs 27:7


#raisethebar

Wildly free. 

This view. I woke up to so many of the sweetest messages from friends and family and I’m so blessed. Blessed to call Kentucky where I am learning to grow deep roots. Blessed because my home is scattered among the hearts of people I love, in different places. Blessed to have a family of friends ,and friends that have become family. Blessed to get to celebrate their best moments and be present in their worst.  
I woke up this morning and the cold was beckoning me outside. Wrapping me in a big blanket and urging me out in my sock feet. Breathing in the cold air was harsh in my lungs and at the same time it reminded me of these mountains. It reminded me that I’m small…but mighty. I’m made of jagged grey, a million lush variations of green and speckled with vibrant gold. These mountains remind me I can do hard things. And when I can’t…that’s ok too, because He can.
Give up your defeated I can’t for the beautiful freedom of He can.
#raisethebar #lovenotes #kylo

Boundless.

Thunder woke me startled this morning. For a second I felt the desire and need to just snuggle in for a few more minutes.
 In one week I’ll probably completely forget how in love I was waking up to those cracks and rumbles this morning. In a few hours I may not be able to hear them over the sounds of lab instruments and air conditioning systems and fans, but in that moment all I wanted was to watch rain drops race down window panes, to snuggle into this moment a little deeper, because it is beautiful, relaxing, and so completely peaceful.
It reminded me that last night I lay in the dark and a few tears escaped and ran down my cheeks. I realized in that moment how little I believed that God actually had all, I mean ALL, of my life. I realized how little I believed that He actually had a plan in what feels monotonous and mundane. In the midst of my dark bedroom I was reminded of His all consuming light.
This morning I connected those moments and I remembered what my sister reminded me of months ago, you can’t cap God. He is organic, free…wildly free, and He is bigger than my fears, my problems, and my strengths. I was reminded of watching lightning over the Rocky mountains and realizing God is big. And not just New York City big, mountains big, or whole earth big, but without bounds, big. Standing on the beach can’t see any land big, looking into the sky realizing we aren’t in a snow globe big. He isn’t a genie in a lamp. He cannot be contained, capped, or wrangled or reigned in like an overstuffed suitcase you sit on to close. He is doing big things. He is working things for your good. He is holding you when you want to snuggle in bed. He is holding you when you are making big moves and He is holding you when the floor seems to have dropped out from under you. And he doesn’t have a square box that says how He can or will do it. It’s not A, B, C, or a combination of those three.

 It’s b o u n d l e s s. 

He makes the rules. He has no boundaries. So whatever you are going through this morning, I pray for peace in your hearts and a call in your soul. One step in faith, that He has all of your life.
Genesis 1:2-3 is on my heart this morning.
2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.

Just soaking in this verse…

Busy. 

Lately I’ve caught myself more often than not responding to people asking “how’s life?” with an exasperated “busy”. 
I run on an elliptical and read books. I watch tv and cook dinner, while folding laundry, doing dishes, and sorting mail. I talk on the phone and fill out paperwork while making schedules and to do lists in my head, on post it’s, or on my phone. I run from here and there and get home sometimes after 9 or 10 at night. This is my normal. 
Then I came across this verse. 
The plans of the diligent lead surely to abundance and advantage, 

But everyone who acts in haste comes surely to poverty.

Proverbs 21:5 AMP
I’ve felt so convicted the past week to be intentional. And busy doesn’t always feel intentional. It feels like calendar invites, volunteering, driving, eating out, and crashing when I get home exhausted, feeling tired waking up to do it again. 

Sure some seasons in life are busier than others. Volunteering and having a schedule isn’t a bad thing, but it can be when it gets to be too much. When we stretch ourselves too thin. 
It’s so easy to feel productive or purposeful when I’m moving, but there can also be a lot of wasted life under the label of busy. To the outside world I might seem like “she can do it all”, “she’s got it together”, “how does she have energy for that?”, but in reality we can’t maintain that lifestyle. We need balance. Seasons of “busy” and seasons of rest. 
I don’t have it all together, I have energy because I drink about six cups of coffee almost everyday and don’t stop moving until my head hits my pillow at night. 
I’m tired and worn out and in complete need of Jesus. (Matthew 11:28-30) I cherish Saturday and Sunday mornings because I get to slow things waaaaay down. I paint and cook and listen to music. Moly (my hedgehog) helps me to get outdoors and sit in the grass or pull out my hammock. I used to struggle with this, sitting still, and now I crave it, like mountains and starry skies.
But I walked out of work yesterday to this sky. 

Sometimes God gets my attention by taking my breath. It works every time. Slow down your busy. You don’t have to do it all. It’s beautifully freeing.